Chapter Five: Vicky, The Woman Holding Herself Together Like A Robot

“Hello Holly.  I’m good; nice to see you too.  How have you been? Anything fun going on for you this summer?”

“Oh I’m just going to take my daughter to Michigan and kind of drive until we find a cheap hotel on the beach.  We have fun just kind of hanging out.  What about you – anything fun coming up?”

“Actually yes.  A friend and I are planning to go to Petra together.  Neither of us have been to see it and I am really excited.”

“Oh that sounds so exotic Vicky – you are so adventurous.  I don’t know where that is so I’m going to have to Google it to take a peek!  Good for you for planning something so different!  I really admire that about you.  Okay, well you ladies have a great day.”

“Thanks Holly, you too.”

“Ok Vicky, I was so nice to catch up with you. I better be off to run some errands or I’ll never get anything done today.”

“Ok Sandy.  Take care and definitely call me if you want to try getting on a regular workout routine or something.”

“Will do, bye!”

Sigh.

I think I’ll sit here a little longer and have coffee.  Maybe I’ll go back to the gym for a yoga class or another run.  And then out for a drink with Joe tonight…Joe from Match.com.   Forty-two, loves reading and travel and enjoys football.  I wonder what he’ll be like in person.   His last email was so light and funny…please be like that in person Joe.  Please.  I really need somebody fun in my life.

Why is it so hard to find a partner and fall in love?  Seems like an odd conundrum…all this angst and worry and not knowing what will happen.  I really want to feel it again…like I did with Ben…so in love…except that wasn’t real I guess.  But it felt so perfect.

How could you back out on me after we agreed to get the ring Ben?  I am so over it.  I mean it didn’t kill me.  I know I am the one who took us shopping and everything but seriously, to buy a ring with me and then change your mind?

My stupid sister says I shouldn’t have been so insistent; but I don’t see why we wouldn’t go ahead and get married when everything was so right with us.  Who cares how long you date?  Three months is long enough if you’ve founds the right person.  I mean why not?  I loved you.

I am so angry with my sister; she’s such a know-it-all.

What kind of man are you Ben?  I loved you so much…and your little lop-sided grin…and how we were so silly together…but you probably won’t even remember that stuff…and yet I’ll never forget  it.  I thought you were a man who knew what he wanted.  Whatever.  I am tired of thinking about you Ben.  I am seeing Joe tonight and who knows what will happen.  And my business is doing so good.  Whatever.  My life is moving ahead without you.  Whatever Ben.  Whatever.  Jerk.

I better call Mandy and see if she’s following her diet like we talked about.  She could be in such good shape if she didn’t snack all day – I don’t know what’s wrong with her.  And Martin; he better be sticking to the low calorie plan we wrote up.  I swear these people come to me for help and then they can’t follow the simplest rules.

Look at Holly talking to that lady in the red coat now.  She is always so cheery.  I wish I could be like that.

I miss you Ben.

Coming Next – Chapter Six:  Maddie, The Lady in the Red Coat

From the short story Thoughts and Conversations in a Diner

Tags: diner, love, short story