When Single Parents Go On Vacation…Without Kids
Late last night, J. and I journeyed back from our little get-away to Gold Canyon, Arizona. We almost melted as a result of this complete and thorough form of relaxation, better known as “a vacation without the kids.”
On our first night, we chatted excitedly about our dining options…shall we try the restaurant at the hotel? Maybe the little Mexican place we just drove past? Or that steak joint that some unknown person had given five stars to online? We picked Mexican, saving the hotel dinner for the next night with a friend and mentor of J.’s, and, noting that the same nameless rater of the steak place had also given the local McDonald’s five stars (no offense McD’s),decided not to try the steak joint.
By the end of day two, J. had played 18 holes of golf on the greenest course I have ever seen – I am certain it contains emerald dust in its folds – and I had been manicured, pedicured, facial-ed, and massaged…time at the pool had helped us relax after all that relaxing (as evidenced by my toes, below)…we were slowing down to the pace of whoever, or whatever, was the slowest predecessor of snails.
Then came a startling revelation on day three, when J. said, ”What shall we get for dinner?” We sat in absolute silence for five minutes which then morphed into each of us offering the other a thousand options: ”Well would you like a sandwich? Or salad? Or something heavier? Or Mexican again? Or just buy something to cook? Or…?” Finally we exploded into laughter as we realized we weren’t used to getting to pick what we eat, where we eat, or even when we eat of so many days in a row! With three girls between us, someone else usually picks when we are on vacation (and it’s easier to comply than try to force agreement because we want to make the girls happy…ok, that’s untrue; the absolute truth is that we are chickens and we are afraid to take them on; it’s too exhausting!)
We opted for a delicious menu of treats in our room via room service, choosing to sit on the back patio (see photo) and chatting for three whole hours without any interruption! An orchestra of talented birds filled in as background music, the slowly setting lava sun that bathed the canyon all day ended its work day, and the mountains magically changed from their daytime wardrobe of red-coppery robes to deep browns and smokey-blue gowns.
The highlight of our trip was our drive along the 80-mile-long Apache Trail (rated by Frommer’s as one of the most scenic drives in the United States). The best way for me to describe this totally indescribable sampling of Mother Nature’s sheer peacefulness and beauty is to say it would be like being able to drive across the Grand Canyon – right through the center; we mortals naively attempted to capture some of it on camera…but could not do it justice. 22-miles of this picturesque drive was on a single lane unpaved dirt road (no guard rails! 3000 to 4000 feet up!) with two-way traffic. In many cases, that two-way traffic is also hauling a huge boat as this is also the road to Apache Lake and Roosevelt Lake…talk about wide-eyed awe and fear!
Now let me remind you that all this time, we had no one in the back seat glaring over being left out of something, grumpy about sitting in the middle, or asking when we’d get home, or asking when we could have a burger, or complaining about getting no signal for texting – ahhhh! Can you imagine the perfection?
That night, when everything was peaceful, and both of us were relaxed, I felt so happy, and I just knew we were exactly where we were supposed to be.
So, what do you think happened next – with two single parents on vacation, sans kids? Yep – we’ve decided to come back with the kids. We missed them. There’s no hope for us, is there?
Have a great week -
Swati
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Oh, I am dreaming about a vacation without the kids – my mom just retired and has suggested she’s up for at least a long weekend… Oh bliss!
Oh do it Parenting ad absurdum – it’s so worth it (even if you end up missing them anyway
).
Can’t wait to hear where you go…!
Swati
So jealous! But in a good way!
I’m stopping by from the MBC Aspiring Writers group. The trip sounded lovely! I can’t wait to go on one…someday! haha. And don’t worry, hubby & I always end up talking about the kids quite a bit whenever we’re without them!
I’m jealous! Especially love the picture at the pool with your nice pedicure!
Shay – I am so happy to hear you say that
!
CharlieGirl and Robin: no need to be jealous…why don’t we just have a spa day?!
Swati
That’s so funny, Swati! I know exactly what you mean. Even though I’m not a single parent, on the extremely rare occasion when hubs and I were able to take a vacation without our kids it was so awesome and we’d think, “why don’t we do this more often?” But in the next moment, we would be thinking exactly as you were, “Oh, wouldn’t the kids love to see this? Or that?”
Sounds like you had a great time though!
No kids. What a concept! As a single parent with no one to help with kids (elderly parents, ex not an option) it sounds like bliss and terrifying at the same time. Hard to date when just trying to stay overnight once in a blue moon requires military planning, considerable expense and uncertain kids. But then on the very rare occasions I’ve managed an overnight it feels so strange but good at the same time – kind of like being a sparrow set down in the middle of a tropical paradise. Nice place to visit, wouldn’t know how to live there.
Rebecca – that is SO well stated – you know the paradise is lovely, gorgeous even; but how do you live without stepping on Legos or barbie shoes? I have no idea what I am going to do when she turns 18 and goes to college – yikes! LOL at the military planning
!
Holly – we had a fabulous time but I’m glad to hear there are others like us out there!!
Swati
Swati! So good to see you again. Your vacation spot looks divine. (Remind us again of just why you came back??)
*Waving*
Happy summer, girl.
Haha – you are so right – shoulda just had somebody mail the kids to us!!
Totally waving back with vigor!
Swati
What a wonderful trip and much deserved! My sisters and I sometimes go on sisters’ weekends sans kinder, and it’s a wonderful way to reconnect with each other and ourselves. It’s funny how much we enjoy those times. You’re right, though, we each end up calling our kiddos tons of times and missing them a bunch!
Oh, boy, do I relate to this one!! (Although it took me a good 48 hours to really relax without being Mama… I wasn’t used to it!)
You made me laugh with that bit about you two going on and on about your dinner possibilities. Oh, the wealth of choices… when you don’t have a picky eater demanding to go for Mac ‘n Cheese. LOVE the photos!
Sounds like a dream Swati! I’d love to say I can just fly off with just my husband but I think I’d miss my little man the whole time …ok not the first five minutes but very soon thereafter (-:
Tiia: What a great idea – I always wished for a sister to do that stuff with!
Single Mom Seeking: no mac ‘n’ cheese, pizza or chicken nuggets ALL WEEKEND – Yowza!!
Mrsblogalot: Haha – I think it would take about 4 hours…right after a margarita and a massage
….
XO –
Swati
Swati, If you’re passing through Scottsdale, AZ. Stop by Sprinkles for cupcakes. Unless you get deported, in that case we will send you a care package! Safe Travels from the gals at RedShoeWay
Oh man big sis – I wish I knew about that last weekend…cupcakes make me melty (in the good way
!)
Swati
We went away to Negril last summer and it was a little weird being away from my baby. I enjoyed myself, but felt out of place at times. I think everyone with kids should get away at least once a year w/o them. It does wonders for your mind. I’m not talking about a 2 week excursion, just 3-4 days, and then a vacation with them of course!
It also gives them a taste of independence, which is always good in the long run.
Really good point Shelley about them feeling some independence (as long as I can control it, of course
)!
Swati
Hey Swati! I’m really glad you enjoyed your vacation sans kids! I’m sure Rachel would have been very upset without the ability to text! Haha
I also hope you are handling the craziness of my dad’s excitement for the world cup well…he wishes he could be one of those players!
Your blog is great by the way! I’m so impressed with how well put together and how interesting the variety of posts are! Can’t wait to see you guys again!
Amanda
Awww Thanks Amanda!! Your dad definitely has World Cup Fever for which there is no cure except waiting it out
….thanks for giving me bloggy love – I need all I can get.
Plan a trip and hop on over – we’ll have a ton of fun!
Swati