You can spend the rest of the year in your room! You’re grounded for a month! You’re going to bed now!
Have you ever heard a stream of haphazard punishments come spewing out of your mouth? Err….ummm…I’ve done that. And I’ve gotten an angry, eye-rolling response back from my daughter. And then I’ve felt ridiculous because I can’t even remember what I’ve rattled off.
Apparently I am not alone (whew!) because Scott Gale, author of Your Family Constitution: A Modern Approach to Family Values and Household Structure and his son were having some sort of disagreement while their entire family was at the beach. And it left him screaming “You’re done with TV for the week! You’re going to bed right after dinner! You can spend the rest of the day in your bedroom!” On other words, Mr. Gale went berserk with punishment threats – and soon realized it wasn’t his best moment.
On another day, the Mr. Gale finds himself telling his sons they cannot watch TV after breakfast one Saturday only to hear his sons ask why it was ok last Saturday; he doesn’t have a good answer and he realizes that he’s been expecting them to act on his whim-of-the-day. And he knows what he really want is to cultivate a healthy family atmosphere (yup, me too!).
The culmination of these reflections is this book, which provides a step-by-step process to build a Constitution for your family (hooray!). This book provides a clear-cut method for managing a busy family in a practical and attainable way – and requires everyone in the family to be an active participant with clear accountabilities.
Be warned however that Your Family Constitution is not for the weak-hearted – parents are held to behaviors and agreements just like the kids; for example, if Mr. Gale doesn’t work out three times a week, he does not get to hog the TV on Sunday to watch football!
Check it out – my daughter and I are coming up with some of our “laws” now and it’s actually been fun to be having the conversation.
You can buy this book at Amazon at:
or
http://tinyurl.com/yfqq2to
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Oh goodness! We all do that… don’t we? ??
It’s a terrible thing, spouting out those stupid punishments.
Something to work on and be a good example!
Blessings,
Janet
I have done that more times than I can count! Wait ’till you daughter becomes a teenager! Ha! Ha!
Oh, I wish someone would tell me to spend the rest of the day in my room
Peryl
Robin: I dread that very thing!! My boyfriend had a teen daughter and.I.am.not.ready.
Peryl: I give myself time outs, but my daughter always interrupts them!
Swati
I find myself doing this very thing more and more as my 9 year old daughter quickly seems to be going from girl to tween. The attitude and eye-rolling are coming fast and furious. Little does she know that she’s dealing with the queen of teen drama. Hopefully my past experience will help me know what to do when the drama surfaces.
Hi Beth:
I’m glad it’s not just me with a daughter going back and forth from “girl” to “tween”!! It”s so funny – in a second she can turn into a cutie needing a hug…and then seconds later there’s some kind of drama…deja vu…
Swati
Thank you very much for the review. I appreciate your thoughts and am glad that the book has sparked some fun conversations with your daughter. Good luck!
Thanks Scott for stopping by – great book!
Swati